Written by Kristina Duke
I know I’m not alone when I say I don’t feel I have enough time, yet I seem to spend far too much time on social media and the like.
So, let’s have a discussion about time management and your goals. (Ok that went serious way too fast.)
Instead let’s delve a little into the whys we often use social media.
To keep connected to our friends.
Awesome reason because friendships are awesome. I do love how Facebook has given us a beautiful casual way to know a little of what’s going on with our friends, acquaintances, neighbours and family. Some give us a little too much info (thank you for posting a photo of every meal you have friend) and others hardly post anything (like my Dad - Maybe they are just stalking everyone, watching but never commenting or posting themselves. ) But the reality is, is it really connecting us?? When was the last time you physically picked up the phone and called a friend and had a good chat or better yet met up in person for a coffee or a meal? You can’t really get a true insight into peoples lives from their highly edited narratives that they post. We really only get to see the good stuff – the kids awards, birthday parties, the MasterChef inspired dinners etc. I believe better connection comes with actually spending time with people.
Window shopping.
The power of the internet has given us retail businesses both big and small at our fingertips. As a busy mum I have enjoyed the convenience of online grocery shopping for sure especially when my kids were young, or my schedule was tight. But in general the pop-up ads that pollute our feeds only seem to entice us with things we probably don’t need. When we are continually thinking we need this and that to be happy, it changes our whole mindset to one filled with selfishness, ungratefulness and even jealousy. The point seems strong I know but it is commonly understood in coaching world that your thoughts lead to your emotions which lead to action. The scary part is that you are probably not even aware of the undercurrent of promotion as you scroll through your various social media accounts.
Networking.
Maybe you have a small business or are wanting to keep abreast of what’s going on in your industry or an interest group, for this social media can be a powerful tool to network with like-minded individuals that our physical paths may never cross. I use it for networking with other business mums, ADHD support groups, Professional Organiser groups and more. But it’s only helpful if we USE it. I’m no expert on this so I won’t begin to fully explain it, but it takes some effort and engagement to get traction for sure. Like any relationship, time needs to be dedicated for it to develop. If you choose to lurk in the shadows, you will not experience the benefits rather you may just feel defeated and inadequate. If you aren’t utilising these tools I recommend possibly removing yourself from some so that you are not so overwhelmed with commitment.
Entertainment.
A lot of what we actually do on Social Media is really just to entertain us. We watch the funny viral videos, like the memes, save the recipe ideas and generally get a summary of the world around us. Speaking from experience seen in my household Social Media often becomes our default now. What do I mean by this? Conversation lags, lets jump on our phones. Waiting for a bus, jump on our phones. Wake up, jump on our phones. We don’t allow ourselves to be unstimulated for barely a second before we reach for social media.
The wonderful tool that Social Media is has now become clutter in our lives. We are filling our lives with a collection of untidy, not really important things. Just like any “thing” in our lives if we have too much of it, it stops being a good thing for us.
In my work as a Professional Organiser I work with clients to help declutter their homes. The first thing I have to consider is the space available. So, if we were working on their books, I would have to work within the limitations of the bookshelf they have i.e. we can keep as many books that will fit the shelf. Unfortunately, I don’t have any superpowers that can make things elasticised and expand on command, so we have to declutter. In this process of decluttering I work with my client to help decide what will stay and what goes. Here are some questions that may be asked
- How long has it been since you used that?
- How often do you use that?
- Does it have sentimental or special value to you?
- Is it easily replaceable?
- Do you have something else that is similar or duplicate?
When we ask these questions, it helps to discern what we should keep. We often collect things at a time, that no longer benefit us now or hold on to things out of a sense of duty. Our social media activity can be the same. We may follow a certain person that interested us years ago, be part of a group that we actively engaged in previously but have lost interest in now or just a friend that we haven’t engaged with for years. I know it’s true for me, so I periodically go through my Facebook groups, friends and settings and adjust as needed so that my feed is more aligned to my interests and value now.
As well as the physical editing of our social media it is imperative that we also set limits of the time allocated to it in our schedules. I regularly hear the complaint “I have no time” “I’m too busy”, yet I know hours get lost on social media. Here’s a tip – if you know you being disciplined is hard and you will struggle keeping track of time, use technology to help you. I know for iPhone you can turn on ‘screen time limits’ which will physically stop the phone being able to used for selected apps once you reach your allocated time limit. How cool is that? It’s like having your own personal Life Coach in your phone reminding you to spend time on what is important.
Social Media is great but like any good thing, too much of it will often have you feeling overwhelmed, unfocused and discouraged. I think its time to take back control, set some limits and declutter our feeds so that we have time for the important things in our lives – our family, friends and hobbies.
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